I know I said I could do these things.
I know I made deciding to seem easy.
But now look at this mess, the result of me just doing my best.
Its reflection is messing with me.
High winds, rough sailing, paralyzing.
I am here, on my knees, eyes closed realizing.
The monster in me is eating up my sleep.
It’s all I can do to keep, it together.
looking forward to brighter weather.
Time to start feeding the route I’ve taken.
This garden needs some attention.
Some time and a little tending.
I’ve got some weeds to pull and a little raking.
Got some dead things, ready to awaken.
Got some live ones, that are only faking.
Got to listen to the intuitions whispering.
Secrets otherwise hiding between the vines.
Nothing about life is meant to breeze by me.
What am I hiding? What am I hiding from?
And why in the meantime, have I been consorting with the enemy?
Right behind my own two eyes, A battle rages on,
Between the foe antagonizing and answers I seek.
Looking into a face I know.
I love every scar. Every hue and defining line.
I take in the beautiful body that suits me perfectly.
The loving energy that’s gone the distance with me.
I walk with my shadow through an ever-shifting dream.
Dipping through the winds that are changing me,
I take a chance to dance with the flow,
take a leap into the unknown on this leg of the journey.
no matter where these shoes take me,
they will make me stronger.
The path can no longer crush me.
Reality never shook me to break me but to show me.
You didn’t let me realize I was drowning,
until after I’d already been saved.
Life happens most beautifully
when unfolding in little miracles.
I focus on my heart beating.
Really take in the breath I’m breathing.
All the while, remembering,
Life kept me through my worst seasons,
it must have deemed me a seed worth saving…
I’m still breathing, it’s all gravy.
Finally seeing the truth tucked away.
Time to let it go, let it all out,
Let the cards fall where they may.
No more mayhem in me.
I watch peacefully
as chaos turns into harmony,
Right in front of me.