I am weary and in need of a long rest and some deep breaths. Beneath the forest canopy that knows me best. It’s under these I burn my debts. Let my hair loose and howl to the sun and the moon. They don’t mind, in fact, they invite me often enough I’m starting to feel like family. Beaconing me on a breeze, come, we are waiting, the smell of pines alerts me they must be missing me the same.
That silly gumby Life Baby that spins and runs free, I can almost imagine them saying. No roots to keep me grounded, though, I’m sure they feel for me, wondering how I stay wandering freely, happily, for they could never imagine life that way. They see through the eyes of their species, I wonder if someday I will do the same. You are what you eat, and my toes have been sinking into the grass and dirt under them, frequently. Upgrades? Um, I’m ready…
In any case, it’s time again, and this visit is impromptu. I need a moment. I stand steady and close my eyes, sink my roots in and imagine them tapped into the circulating forest. Let me be with you for a moment. I find my mind calling out to them. Tell your leaves my problems in the hopes each one of them might laugh and admonish me for being silly and taking too seriously what is meant to pass through the heart of me easily and leave a piece of its essence within my tune for depth and vibrancy. Hmm… interesting.
Interesting the ideas that come to me while I am under their canopy. Otherworldly, as if they aren’t from me… but a billion little whispers competing to speak with me. Rivers of wind over a breeze sent spiraling down to me. Each drop of air I take in, a piece of advice as old as the trees, tales as old as time even. Their deep roots tapped into everything… I trust these for my company, and my counseling, I know how fragmented I get, how could I ever let another fractal diamond in the making deface me and label me with something silly, that a little pill or prescribed contrived advice might cost me an arm and a leg and render me as interesting as a garbage bag. No thank you. With help like that, nom sayin’?… I imagine a million giants laughing through the breeze.
Knowing what I know now, I will never repeat the same mistake twice. Are we mice or men? The difference between in so small in the scheme of things, I come to the mother of all things living. Swallowed by the surroundings I take my sanctuary, silently imagining the things in me, swirling, rising out of me. ugly dark ooze all of it, until I’m emerald and shining, the cloud of nothing but clutter drifting upward to feed my friends, an offering.
I breathe it into the trees who eat it readily. I imagine them pouring the opposite out to meet me, returning to me air in all its purity. A thank you for the CO2 and news, my little Duette. We see you. We will be watching. Eyes on you. Our little prize. We will protect you… Keep doing what you’re doing, it’s part of the new thing.
And really, that’s all I need. Some reassurance, a little nudge, some spit shine, and a little peace for the ride. I can’t get that when I try to connect with my own kind if I am running on empty, especially. In this place and time, it’s up to me to ask big from beyond me for things I simply desire, need, want to witness, or see. I wish for these things from the heart of me. So, I sit and tell it to the trees until I am full of nothing, blissed and Sunkissed… and I can’t imagine this world any better than it is. What a beautiful specimen she is… must be why everyone in it is so covetous of pieces meant for every one existing to partake in. Let us be free in our minds, and see what we do with them. Tell them, birds, bees. Deliver the message for me… Sit down, and shut up to the loudest least universally useful voices speaking over everyone, to spread disharmony, disease, and disconnection as if it were their duty. It’s time for them to go within. A time to listen to Life talking all around until they sound less… un… done and riddled in poor repetitions.
Peace is a right, promised to all who subscribe to LIFE… and I do. I came here the same as everyone else who’s new. Through my mother and father connecting, this place did nothing to construct that bond or keep it from fracturing, in fact, it all but broke the unit I was born into. I am what I am, and I don’t recall asking for these forms of governance at all. Chains and shackles.
I won’t rebel, I simply don’t buy what they sell. No side has my interest and so I am interested in anything but IT. I ask that my compass take hold of me and lead me where I am going. No more white noise, no more what has been. I will pay it no more of my attention. Always forward is more than a theme or a hopeful dream to me… I’m walking it, despite everything. Thanks to the strong trees walking before me. Not that fear doesn’t hit me deeply, I strike back, flip script, and beat the little hack from my premise until it closes the door behind it; and only AFTER I’m finished reminding it of all the other times, I’d proven it wrong, and to move along. Begone… fears-kind isn’t welcome here, the rule applies to those mongering and peddling it.
And so, fear runs from me, like a massive flea, tail between its legs while it’s skittering. cockroach didn’t know my breed. I’m an outdoor dog with a taste for everything living, parasites find me repelling. I love authenticity, I house no sugary façade for them to feed, and they find my humor scalding. So they will point at me and say those like me are the problem in need of dissolving. Yet, this is the most alive one can hope to be. I am a dog, loyal to this bone in me. I’ll follow it at ease knowing it’s my magical string through this valley of crazy.
… And to think, all this came from a visit to the trees around me.